Hm, actually for the past 2 days I realise there's so much I'm thankful for. Adjusting back to Singapore's taking quicker than it took last summer, when I had insomnia for a month and was emotionally quite a wreck most of the time. Also, there's a healthy affection and paradoxical attachment/detachment with the people and things here, perhaps it's in knowing that people, environment and customs change over time and especially in the transits from/to York and SG, things don't always remain constant. Then again, it's still rather early to say because it's only been a week (seemed like at least 2 tho?) and I'm still making my way round the scheme of things; it's still a tad bit blurry and I feel half-blindfolded still, but the Lord's my vision and light...
It's a nice feeling, this being alone at home while Wei's in school, Kor's at work and Ma's in college. Slept a ridiculous amount of 12 hours and dreamt of weird things like Sarah from Derwent CU and my older brother being political science coursemates in SINGAPORE, and me rushing to meet a deadline for a film project which involved actual filming and digital editing...... am not sleeping well still, but these things take time. For one, I'm not entirely used to the heat still.
But, anyway, this... feeling of quietness and peace that I miss about York is settling into life here in its own way. The symphony of voices might be slightly different - instead of ducks and student roarings we have sounds of automobiles and construction work and yes, the occasional song of birds, but pictorially it's still the same expanse of clouds painted on the sky's canvas by the Artist of all artists. Two different places, but the same Lord.
And finally this morning I was told to rest, just rest and stop fidgeting about which ministry I should serve in or whom I should meet or what I should do in order to keep my faith - because I can't
do anything to keep it, and everything will come naturally once I just let go and
rest in Him. letting go, letting go -
and there may be a ton of things to do and a list of items to tick off, but I'm doing it in God's rest. The list of things actually unfolding are somewhat interesting... going to Ministry of Education tomorrow (1 hour away from my house by MRT, bleah) to entertain JC2 potential scholars and parents in a 2-hour session at the main office, meeting a large group of JC friends tomorrow at a BBQ, and next week there'll be a fellowship thing that's not very different with YCCF; one that my mom's leading. It comprises of Chinese (prc) students around my age who're here doing their studies. It'll be interesting but a challenge I guess, in terms of language and befriending people, also it's going to be weird when people will know me as "惠英姐的女儿"...... but I'm looking forward to it anyways!
This peace is amazing. thanks to Daddy. On a random side note I am eating way too much than I ought to; I'm eating almost constantly and my bro called me a rodent. Which is surprising because I usually lose weight when I'm home. Ha. What am I complaining about? :D
ah. wheee. Hope y'all are doing great, wherever you are? -muacks- God wuvs you.
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